My Fridge Smells Like Farts! And other summer delights.

How many of you have heard that one before? It's true, but there are some pitfalls to watch out for.
For instance, a couple of days ago I did some batch cooking, as is my custom a couple of days a week. I made a batch of chicken breasts, steamed some broccoli and kale, and hard-boiled a dozen eggs. I also blended a couple of pounds of spinach and froze it into an ice cube tray for morning smoothies (if you haven't had a chocolate protein shake with spinach and banana for breakfast, you haven't really lived - try it and I promise you will feel like a superhero until at least noon! Recipe below). I also filled up the house with awesome fresh fruit and veggies for snacking and there, I made a grave miscalculation. Note to self: avoid Costco on days that Organic Box comes, or I will find myself with more fruit and veggies than will fit in the fridge.

So now, I have a fridge packed full of healthy meals and snacks, a dining room table with a veritable mountain of delicious fruit on it as well as avocados, cherry tomatoes, bell peppers, cucumbers, and onions. Because it's July, I also have an EPIC fruit fly infestation of horror movie-like proportions.

What to do about fruit flies? People ask me that question on a pretty daily basis so clearly I'm not alone...although what I have going right now eclipses past fruit fly seasons exponentially. The answer is, not much. Oh sure, you can spend time making gooey traps in jars with funnels, which really look lovely and smell even better. But it won't get rid of them. The little assholes will just hide in your drains, garbage cans, bathrooms or wherever else there might be delicious rottenness. What you can do to keep the population under control is bleach all your drains, clean all of the garbage cans, and put all your produce in the fridge for a few days. A fruit fly's full life cycle lasts about three days given a plentiful food supply - take that away and they will mostly die out. Mostly.

But it only takes one kid to leave an apple core behind the computer monitor and they'll be back in force. Don't worry though, soon as fall hits they will be gone again! I find that the most effective fruit fly mitigation technique is a perception adjustment: we could have cockroaches. Or rats.

Fruit flies? Psh - no big deal.

There's a special opportunity that presents itself when you have a fridge full of hard-boiled eggs and steamed greens. You can either embrace your inner eleven-year-old and take advantage of the prank potential here, or hate every minute of it...but chances are if you fight it then you're not going to enjoy preparing food in advance for too long so I would urge you to try the following:

1. Wait until your family is comfortable in the living room or dining room.

2. Open the fridge.

3. Close the fridge.

4. Wait.

5. Listen and laugh inwardly as shrieks of "you FARTED! Eeewwww, you STINK!" "Me?! That was YOU! I HEARD you!" start drifting in from wherever they are.

6. Laugh out loud as they all start beating on each other.

7. Go break it up before someone sustains an injury.

8. Repeat.

Hannah's Greenish Morning Superhero Shake

2 cups fresh spinach
1/4c water

Blend thoroughly in a Magic Bullet or powerful blender.


Add:
1 scoop chocolate protein powder
1 scoop greens powder (for this shake I like Genuine Health's Greens + extra energy in Cappucino flavour)
1 tbsp. Cocoa

Blend again.

Add:
1 frozen banana
Fill the rest of the cup with coffee or water

Blend again and enjoy!